I’m not
sure if the prodigious output on this blog over the last 10 years represents an
achievement to be proud of, or something to be ashamed of.
At times I
think that a lot of the time and energy I’ve put into this blog over the past
10 years would have been better directed at other areas of my life.
Other
times, I still can’t believe how awesome it is that I can write something and
publish it to the whole world.
Seriously,
20 years ago, who would have predicted that we would all have easy access to
platforms in which we could all share our opinions and reviews with the whole
world.
Even though
social media has been common place for the last 10 years now, I’m still in the
honeymoon phase. I still can barely
believe I’m literally able to publish something to the whole world. Who would have thought?
Of course
for the next generation coming up, this is going to be taken for granted as
simply the way the world works.
Sidenote: I
recently came across an old book which was a collection of essays, one of which
was an essay on how much television had changed the culture. It struck me that this type of essay would be
impossible to write nowadays, because no one can remember what the culture was
even like before television. In the same way, we are the last generation that’s
going to be able to comment on how the Internet has changed the culture. Today’s incoming college freshman can’t
remember a world without the Internet, and can barely remember life before
social media.
For
example, we are the last generation that will embarrass ourselves on the
Internet and have this be a new phenomenon.
I’m looking
back at some of the posts I’ve written over the past 10 years, and experiencing
some of that embarrassment now. Good
Gravy! The idiot drivel I’ve written on this blog in the past!
My
sister-in-law once summed up nicely the perils of blogging: “I look at my
journal from 2 years ago,” she said, “And I think: What an idiot I am! I couldn’t imagine having that stuff all up
on the Internet.”
I
understand this sentiment completely. I
share the affliction, common to all writers, where I believe that everything I
write is brilliant as it comes off my fingers. It’s not until after a couple months go by,
and I re-read my old posts, and then I think to myself: “I’m such an idiot!”
No doubt
this is a problem shared by more people than just me. Probably that’s the reason why most of my
friends have not only abandoned their old blogs, but deleted them entirely.
(Back in
2004-2005, when blogging was at the height of its popularity, most people I
knew had some sort of blog. These days,
not only do very few people I know blog, but most of those old blogs have been
deleted.)
Phil, whose
created and then deleted several blogs over the past 10 years, once said that
he considers deleting your blog every few years to be what he terms “humiliation
management.” (He’s probably not going to
appreciate me bringing this up.)
I, by
contrast, have chosen to leave my archives largely in tact (with a couple notorious
exceptions.) It’s not that I don’t feel embarrassed
about most of the stuff I wrote 10 years ago, it’s just that my fascination
with the idea of interacting with the larger world, and with preserving a
record of that interaction at a point in time in the past, outweighs my sense
of embarrassment. For better or for
worse.
But I would
hate for anyone to think I was unaware of my faults, so let me publicly
acknowledge I’m well aware of how awful most of my writing is.
Originally,
I had in mind to make a long apology for all of the faults of this blog (the narcissism,
the bragging, the self-promotion, the ranting and raving about political issues
instead of providing dispassionate rational arguments, the typos and spelling
mistakes, the clunky sentences, the rambling incoherence, the long-winded
digressions, the stereotyping of Japanese people, et cetera)
….but I decided against it.
Excessive self-criticism is probably just another form of narcissism,
because both operate off the assumption that other people care about you as
much as you care about yourself. Most
people, if they read this blog at all, just give it a quick glance and then
move on with their lives. No one aside
from myself is losing sleep over how terrible most of the posts from 2005
were. Besides, blogging, by its very
nature, is going to attract terribly amateurish writing—(if bloggers were
actually any good at this, we would be writing as a profession.)
Other Notes:
* Actually, maybe
I should retract slightly what I said about blogging attracting terrible
writers. My two favorite bloggers are
Phil and Whisky Prajer (whose blog I found out about
through Phil’s blog). Neither post as
much as I would like them to, but both have a very engaging writing style that
utterly sucks me in to whatever they are writing about.
It is my
ambition to someday hone my style and be able to suck readers into my subject
material as well as these gentlemen do.
* Even in the past 10 years, the Internet has changed a
lot. Back in 2003, there was no youtube, and Wikipedia was still in its infancy. (Here’s the post where I finally discover this wonderful new thing called youtube)
Blogspot
has changed a lot over the past 10 years as well. When I first started back in 2003, it wasn’t
yet owned by Google. You couldn’t label
your posts. In fact, you didn’t even
have separate posts—all the posts published as one page, and so you couldn’t
link back to an individual previous post.
(All the self-referential linking that I do nowadays wasn’t even an
option.)
Originally
Blogspot didn’t have a comments option, so you had to import comments from
another provider. I used Haloscan
comments, but when I updated my blog in 2005, Blogspot erased all the Haloscan
comments.
I really
regret losing all those old comments, especially since a number of you had
taken the time to engage what I had written, and left really witty or
insightful comments.
I also now
have this 2004 post, the sole purpose of which is to respond to some comments, and now those comments aren’t even there anymore.
Such is the
ethereal nature of the Internet.
As someone who takes an interest in history, I sometimes wonder how much
of the modern Internet is going to pass down to future historians. On one hand, given how huge the Internet is,
future historians might be overwhelmed by the amount of information. On the other hand, given how fragile digital
records are, and how little information is being stored on paper these days, we
might well lose most of our cultural records from the 21st century.
Who knows
what the future of this blog might be?
It could disappear from existence overnight if Google shut down its
servers, or it, along with the rest of the blogosphere, could go on to become a
small piece of the cultural records of the 21st century.
* For my last reflections about the nature of blogging, see here.
Link of the Day
9 comments:
Happy anniversary, and well done, sir. Nice to see an early adapter still striking the keys and hitting "post" 10 years later. Yours is a daily visit for me, as well. It is a remarkable platform, isn't it? For me it's taken the heat off so many frustrated ambitions (get published, get read, etc.). In another life I would have had to settle for pen pals (who may or may not write back) and the occasional breakthrough in periodicals that nobody reads. I've got nothing but love for blogger, and the many fine people I've "met" through it -- including yourself, of course. Courage, and excelsior Joel!
Thank you sir.
I as well feel like blogger has been a great release for me. I'll never be published in the real world, but I enjoy being able to write. In another life, I would probably also feel a certain amount of frustration.
Happy Anniversary, Joel. Do you remember how cumbersome our email was as freshman at Calvin? It was like working in DOS. The tech change has been quick and amazing.
Yeah, it is impressive how quickly things change in this day and age. If blogging still exists 10 years later, it will be interesting to see how it develops.
Well, thanks. I've only deleted two blogs, but I've also deleted a lot of posts, so I guess cumulatively it comes to the same thing. I probably spend too much time on humiliation management.
I may start blogging a lot more around the first of the year. My whole "write more complete essays and submit them more places" plan isn't working. If I tell myself, "Nah, son, turn that random thought into a long essay! Don't just put it up on your rinky-dink blog!", it never happens, because this in turn invites the thought "Don't write that essay! Nobody reads essays! Where would you even submit it to? Work on your novel! In fact, don't do that either, because nobody reads novels! Clean the damn house again, YOU WORTHLESS ENGLISH MAJOR!" And then I watch TV.
I look forward to that if that happens. Otherwise, if you concentrate on publishing essays instead, be sure to try and link to published essays from your blog, so I can keep up that way.
You know, if you're ever stuck for post ideas, you've read more than enough history and nonfiction to start doing top-ten lists. "My Ten Favorites on the French Revolution"--that type of thing. I'd read the hell out of that (and in fact it would be pretty useful, as I find myself looking for those kinds of things every time I start to try to read more history. "Should I bother with Hobsbawm? If only a smart person would just tell me the best books on the age of revolutions!"--that type of thing.)
Actually I was thinking if I ever made it to 10 years of book reviewing, I might start doing some top ten lists to mark that. (The first 3 years or so of this blog was largely just fluff. I didn't start systematically reviewing books until 2006 http://joelswagman.blogspot.com/2006/01/book-reviews.html
)
As for Hobsbawm, I found him a challenging read actually. I'm glad I read him, but I really had to work hard to get through his first book.
http://joelswagman.blogspot.com/2009/07/age-of-revolution-1789-1848-by-eric.html
At some point before I die, I want to go back and finish the whole Hobsbawm series, but at this point I just have the first book done.
Anyway, thanks for the advice. I'll start thinking about whatever top 10 lists I could put together.
Actually on second thought, I might put together a few readings lists in the next few weeks after all.
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