Saturday, April 20, 2024

Form for Feedback on Writing

(TESOL Ideas--Writing)

I wrote previously that for my Interesting Input plus Production Prompts, I was trying to primarily use Grammar Auctions as the main way to do feedback on writing accuracy.  And so I was for several weeks.  But recently I've been feeling that my students have been getting a bit sick of grammar auctions.  Plus, it can eat up a lot of class time.
So, I've been experimenting with a new way of giving feedback on writing: a simple form:

Name:


Comments on Story


Language strengths


corrections



I type one of these up for each student on a single Google Doc.  Then I print out the document, cut up the sheets (multiple student feedback will be on a single sheet of paper) and distribute them back to the students.  
I had previously said that I liked to do short handwritten messages, and well I believe that handwritten messages often convey more warmth, I tend to type faster than I write, so typing it up instead of handwriting saves me time.  Plus, another advantage is that I can save a copy of all my feedback, which is useful when it's time to write reports on the students' progress.  
Years of experience have taught me that less is often more when it comes to giving students feedback on their writing.  If you give them feedback on all of their mistakes, they won't absorb any of it.  If you give them feedback on just one mistake, they might absorb it.  So I make it a point to limit myself to just one language error per writing.  (Also, this is for Interesting Input plus Production Prompts writing, in which the focus is on fluency more than accuracy anyway).

Below is a sample of how I used this feedback form recently on student writing.  All the student names have been deleted to protect student privacy, but you get the idea.  This was feedback for the Write Your Own Twisted Fairy Tale Writing Prompt: docs, pub

Name:


Comments on Story

This appears to be written in a poetic style, is that right?  I don’t quite understand it, but I suspect that this is because I am not familiar with the original story

Language strengths

Good use of advanced vocabulary: column, rafter, toss, etc

corrections

“Plays drum”--countable nouns need articles, or need to be put into the plural form. I.e. “plays drums” or “plays the drums”



Name:


Comments on Story

At first, I thought you were just retelling the original story.  But the, out of nowhere, came that sudden twist at the end, which brought a smile to my face as I read it.

Language strengths

Good use of phrases for story telling–e.g. “On the way”, “not even” “out of the house”, etc

corrections

Careful on the tenses.  You are switching back and forth between past and present tense.  Ordinarily we would use the past tense for storytelling



Name:


Comments on Story

I liked the way you changed the hungry wolf to the greedy wolf.  I also thought that was a funny ending when you said that the wolf wasn’t even interested in the straw house.

Language strengths

Good use of advanced vocabulary, and complex sentences.  Also good use of connectors to organize your writing.

corrections

You can use “break into” in this story, instead of “break in” or “break inside”



Name:


Comments on Story

This is an excellent retelling of the original story.  You’ve taken the original structure, but given it a completely new setting and characters, with humorous results.  Well-done.

Language strengths

Lots of good sentences in here.  Your first sentence especially is very well written

corrections

“Say hello with him”--you can change to “say hello to him”


Name:


Comments on Story

This is an interesting story.  Now, in this case, I don’t actually know what the original is, so I can’t appreciate what you’ve changed, but I still thought it was interesting.

Language strengths

Lots of advanced vocabulary here: gratefully, shrug, burn out, coffin, etc.

corrections

Fly is an irregular verb: fly (v1) flew (v2) flown (v3)


Name:


Comments on Story

I love how you took the original story, and then gave it an unexpected twist.  Your ending also seemed to incorporate the dialogue from the Gingerbread Man, so good job putting together two different fairy tales.

Language strengths

Good use of collocations, e.g. hear about, as fast as he can, care about, suddenly appeared, 

corrections

“He didn’t told it to the rabbit”--you can use V1 after “didn’t”--i.e. He didn’t tell”



Name:


Comments on Story

Great job on taking a familiar story, and changing it to make it different.  I love how in this version the turtle is dishonest, and the rabbit is the one who is the hero.

Language strengths

Simple sentences are mostly accurate, and you have some good vocabulary (e.g. honesty, cheat, competition)

corrections

“Because of” is used for noun phrases (e.g. “because of the bus”).  “Because” is used for clauses (e.g. “because the rabbit knew the turtle will run faster”)


Name:


Comments on Story

An interesting twist on a familiar story.  The story zigged and zagged in a number of directions, and, while it got a bit dark at the end, it was certainly creative.

Language strengths

Good use of the “get passive” in the line “The 3 little pigs get eaten by the wolf”

corrections

“The wolf were trying”--”wolf” is singular here, so it should read, “the wolf was trying”


Name:


Comments on Story

This was a good retelling of the 3 little pigs story.  It followed the original enough so that it was familiar, but changed the key details just enough to make it interesting–like the act that the second pig died in the fire instead of being eaten, or that the last pig didn’t care about his brothers.

Language strengths

Good use of collocations: fly away, stable house

Good  use of reported speech: “their mom said that they have to build a stable house”

corrections

“The pig was die in the fire”--”die” is actually a verb here, so you don’t need the “was”-- “the pig died in the fire”


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